人生经验 - If I Knew Then
Chapter 1 Career
Do not consult us, they collectively say. "Listen to your heart."
From http://hbs1963.com/wisdom/careers/
ROD MURTAUGH Work and pleasure are not synonymous, but they're not opposites, either. Loving what you're doing (well) can be infectious and motivating to others. Ultimately, that's leadership.
From http://hbs1963.com/wisdom/careers/
JOAN O. ROTHBERG Decide you like what you do, and do it better and smarter than anyone else. If you can't, change your career. Don’t create an expensive lifestyle — living modestly frees you to make appropriate choices.
From http://hbs1963.com/wisdom/careers/
In hindsight, I realize the lack of real opportunity in my early career was not due to any mistakes I made or to company politics. It was because the opportunities in a declining industry are so constrained, especially compared to an industry that is growing rapidly. With declining growth, companies and their executives become defensive. They do not take risks, and they focus on preserving the status quo.
From http://hbs1963.com/wisdom/careers/ PHILIP B. SMITH Work hard. Be honest. Help others.
From http://hbs1963.com/wisdom/careers/ PAUL G. HINES Be very good at what you do and be good to the people you work with. Honor and respect those who work for you and make your achievements possible.
From http://hbs1963.com/wisdom/careers/
Put up with boring, soul-destroying work only when you’re young, exploring your options, and establishing your credibility. Once you become established, become discriminating about your work, colleagues, clients, and associates.
From http://hbs1963.com/wisdom/careers/
While still a teenager, make a list of all the things you like doing, and those you don’t like. Then find a job or study that maximizes the activities you like and minimizes the others. A happy and fulfilling job should feel like indulging in a hobby. Success is a result of true enjoyment and effort.
From http://hbs1963.com/wisdom/careers/
Look for mentors who are in a place you would like to be, doing what you would like to do. Seek their counsel.
From http://hbs1963.com/wisdom/careers/
RALPH LINSALATA Find an industry that gets you excited and a company that places excellence and integrity at the top of their list of core values. Identify the areas in which you can truly excel. What you do well is not work — no matter how hard it is and how many hours are required. Learn everything you can about your company, its industry, and your job. Understand both the details and the big picture. Always be willing to help others, because many will later help you. Befriend and work with the best people, because they will make you better.
From http://hbs1963.com/wisdom/careers/
Chapter 2 marriage & family
Make family life your first priority. Marry someone you admire and are always learning from, who admires and learns from you. Help each other grow and share values, plans, experience, laughs, and time together.
From http://hbs1963.com/wisdom/marriage-family/
Don’t rush into getting married. At age 35, I knew better where I was headed and whom I wanted to be with. We were shocked at not being able to get pregnant. Never mind. Adoption of newborns turned out to be delightful. (We did it 16 times.)
From http://hbs1963.com/wisdom/marriage-family/
As for family matters, I can be very brief and to the point: Happy wife, happy life.
From http://hbs1963.com/wisdom/marriage-family/
Your children are your legacy. Give them unconditional love within a framework that teaches them your values but also allows them to be who they are. Spend as much time with them as possible. Time spent when they are young is like money in a piggy bank: don’t expect them to spend time with you when you are old if you did not invest in them when they were young.
From http://hbs1963.com/wisdom/marriage-family/
While there are several obvious traits to be sought in a spouse — mutual love, attractiveness, and intelligence — one overlooked but important quality is kindness. Marriage brings both shared happiness and challenges. Kindness allows both parties to understand and empathize with each other as they mutually solve the issues that enter their lives.
From http://hbs1963.com/wisdom/marriage-family/ Have fun. Doing things well is fun. Have a good relationship with each child, set boundaries, ensure each knows being loved. When in doubt, use the three most important words with your spouse: “You’re right, dear.”
From http://hbs1963.com/wisdom/marriage-family/
I have seen many people proudly create products, organizations, buildings, and fortunes. Most of these works have not outlasted the people who created them. I am fairly confident my family will continue as a healthy and confident structure for much longer.
From http://hbs1963.com/wisdom/marriage-family/
Children pay most attention to what you say with your feet, rather than your mouth.
From http://hbs1963.com/wisdom/marriage-family/
Exercise patience. It took me two marriages and 80% of a lifetime to appreciate the value of that word.
From http://hbs1963.com/wisdom/marriage-family/
Spending quality time with your family — not just time — is critical.
From http://hbs1963.com/wisdom/marriage-family/
I envy my friends who have not had to experience divorce. Though many get it right the first time, research shows the odds are not good if you get married before age 30. I believe most of us change a great deal in our 20s, and know ourselves and others better later. I am blessed with great children and, early on, listened to a wise man in my company who told me: “Spend as much time as you possibly can with your kids now, because you can’t come back and do it later.”
From http://hbs1963.com/wisdom/marriage-family/
As for marriage, give space and insist on your own. Before the ceremony, look for brains, even temper (that I lack), a can-do attitude, and accomplishments. Check out the prospective in-laws carefully. And at the end, seek true beauty (philosophy and appearance). Forget infatuation.
From http://hbs1963.com/wisdom/marriage-family/
Respect the interests and desires of each family member. Establish traditions and special geographic places for your family — this becomes more important as families typically move around a lot. Remember that you can’t make up later for missing key times in your family’s life.
From http://hbs1963.com/wisdom/marriage-family/
Teach your children by example. Rejoice in their differences. Remember that you are their parent, not their friend.
From http://hbs1963.com/wisdom/marriage-family/
Teach your children both through mentoring and by example. Build their self-esteem, but teach them how to succeed with humility. Demonstrate team play at home so the family learns the art of working together. Be firm and consistent, but also understanding and flexible. Don’t expect your children to be you or to satisfy your dreams. Let them be themselves.
From http://hbs1963.com/wisdom/marriage-family/
Everyone knows that we allocate time to whatever we value most. Don’t kid yourself into accepting the “quality time is good enough” myth. The gift ofactual time — and a lot of it — is essential to nurturing healthy family relationships.
From http://hbs1963.com/wisdom/marriage-family/
Hang out with your kids a lot, even if it means missing work opportunities. Give your kids the best schooling you can. Exercise together.
From http://hbs1963.com/wisdom/marriage-family/
Chapter 3 Business Never use the pronoun “I” except when taking responsibility for a problem or mistake. When success occurs, it should always be “we” or “they.”
From http://hbs1963.com/wisdom/business/
Communication with all employees is critical. Strategies must be explained repeatedly — as many as 20 times — before most people really understand them.
From http://hbs1963.com/wisdom/business/
With the advent of our society’s love affair with technology, especially in the younger generations, my wish is that those generations understand that communication screen-to-screen is not the same — by a factor of 1,000 — as communication face-to-face. That goes for the classroom, the living room, and the bedroom.
From http://hbs1963.com/wisdom/business/
Success in business relies a lot on making sure your colleagues or employees share a good part of any success you may have. The mistake is to believe that you are more important than anyone else in the business.
From http://hbs1963.com/wisdom/business/
Mistakes: Acting too slowly Waiting until all is understood No (or low) risk Act fast. Take risks.
From http://hbs1963.com/wisdom/business/
One of the biggest mistakes is to think you know it all — or even have to know it all. Learning to surround yourself with people who know more than you do and learning to accept their advice is a big step — especially for people with Harvard Business School-graduate egos. To succeed in business, show people that you appreciate their contributions with public and private praise and financial reward. If your company does well financially, be sure to share that with your key people.
From http://hbs1963.com/wisdom/business/
Chapter 4 leadership
总结一下： Hire the best people (even better than you) and give them credit. Articulate the mission of the company clearly. (communication skills) Set an example.
http://hbs1963.com/wisdom/leadership/
Chapter 5 Wealth THOMAS E. REILLY JR. Money to me is freedom. That is all I want of it. I don’t view it as a yardstick and do not measure myself or others by it. My greatest admiration is for non-financial accomplishment.
From http://hbs1963.com/wisdom/wealth/ CHARLEY ELLIS Spend moderately, invest substantially, and be moderate in “helping” your kids. Do not give them a lot. You’ll mean well, but will be doing them harm.
From http://hbs1963.com/wisdom/wealth/
ANONYMOUS Money is not a sustainable driver of happiness or success — period. Family is.
From http://hbs1963.com/wisdom/wealth/
EUGENE C. BELL I do not agree, although I did until I had worked many years. Find work that you love, as long as you can earn enough to provide for your family and a reasonably comfortable retirement. Those who persist in believing wealth brings happiness are to be pitied.
From http://hbs1963.com/wisdom/wealth/ EYK VAN OTTERLOO On inheriting: We have decided that a little inheritance is fine — a lot is a burden. Our kids all had a great education and the opportunity to go as far as they wanted to go, fully paid for, no debts. We consider that to be the greatest gift parents can give to their offspring.
From http://hbs1963.com/wisdom/wealth/
Chapter 6 growing old ANONYMOUS Retire to something — not from something. Stay engaged. Be physically active and intellectually curious.
From http://hbs1963.com/wisdom/growing-older/
BOB GRIFFIN One of the best suggestions I ever got is to never go to bed without having something in mind that you need to do tomorrow — not just a chore — but something you want to do for yourself or others.
From http://hbs1963.com/wisdom/growing-older/
ANONYMOUS Exercise daily, watch your diet and do what you most enjoy. Read a lot and keep yourself mentally active. Service to others on boards and as a volunteer is important. Stay socially involved in every way you can. Go fly fishing!
From http://hbs1963.com/wisdom/growing-older/
RON LESLIE Humans need to be doing meaningful work. At any age. Or they die.
From http://hbs1963.com/wisdom/growing-older/
EUGENE C. BELL When work becomes too difficult and no longer brings pleasure, it’s time to retire. Become a mentor to the young and stay a loving friend to your spouse. Listen to your physicians.
From http://hbs1963.com/wisdom/growing-older/
GEORGE MOSHER When you retire, it’s important to set up some sense of purpose to your life. You can build on what you have done before or start in a new direction, but the new direction needs to have meaning for you. You cannot make up passions. They must develop from some inner source. Share this purpose with people who are important to you.
From http://hbs1963.com/wisdom/growing-older/
BILL AGEE My advice is to never fully “retire” in the traditional sense of that word. I would replace “retire” with “re-orient,” as this is what I have found keeps me feeling healthy, optimistic, and actively engaged as a positive force in this world. With modern medicine, we have the opportunity to live and work many years longer than our parents did. The key is to make good use of this gift of additional time. To allow our minds and bodies to atrophy is to squander life’s most precious gift. As long as we have eyes to see and ears to hear, we can discover people in need of our talent, compassion, and caring. Reaching out to others is a life force that not only benefits the most vulnerable, but keeps us healthier and happier, too.
From http://hbs1963.com/wisdom/growing-older/
JON B. BOSS Do not wait until it’s time to apply for your Social Security benefits to think about and plan for your retirement. Begin early in life to do things like volunteering, pursuing research, traveling, or writing, so when you do retire from your employment, it is far easier to simply devote more time to them.
From http://hbs1963.com/wisdom/growing-older/
JOHN A. FABIAN Other than the usual advice of staying as active as possible, both mentally and physically, I would add that travel is a great stimulant — and try to spend as much time with other people as possible.
From http://hbs1963.com/wisdom/growing-older/
Chapter 7 Charity and Spirituality
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Chapter 8 Happiness and Success SCOTT SPANGLER Success is when you can spend 90 percent of your time doing the things you want to do and only 10 percent doing things you have to do. Most people’s lives are just the opposite.
ROBERT MCNUTT I think about all my blessings and keep an attitude of gratitude. Success is leaving this world better than when I arrived.
From http://hbs1963.com/wisdom/happiness-success/
CAROL NICHOLSON FRYEBERGER You are as happy as your saddest child (not my original quote). Put your efforts into raising well-adjusted children.
From http://hbs1963.com/wisdom/happiness-success/
DAVE PUTERBAUGH Happiness and success? Knowing who you are. Many people, when asked about themselves, start with saying, “I work for X company.” Then, if faced with a sudden job loss or company closure, they must determine how to define themselves independently of work. Many, if not most, will find themselves in this situation at some point. If you are comfortable with who you are, have confidence in yourself, and don’t depend on your self-image coming from your job, I think you’ll be happy.
From http://hbs1963.com/wisdom/happiness-success/
J. LAWRENCE WILSON When I think back over my career, I am struck that my fondest memories are of people rather than experiences, places, or accomplishments.
From http://hbs1963.com/wisdom/happiness-success/
JOHN H. SCHWARZ Success can be simple. It’s feeling good about yourself and sleeping at night. It’s feeling good about your family and knowing how to work hard, but also how to enjoy yourself. It’s peace of mind and feeling like you have some control over most challenges. At age 25, I probably placed a little too much stress on perception as a measure of success. I’ve learned it’s not what others think, but what you think.
From http://hbs1963.com/wisdom/happiness-success/
MATHEW FRAUWIRTH Success is being satisfied and having made a positive contribution to one’s community. Have you left it better than you found it?
From http://hbs1963.com/wisdom/happiness-success/
Chapter 9 Turning Points JOHN A. FABIAN My first turning point was going to the Harvard Business School. The benefit was not so much what I learned in the classroom, but rather the fact that I learned I could compete with a world-class student body. Getting married was the second turning point. One thing I definitely learned is that one’s choice of spouse is the most important decision one ever makes.
From http://hbs1963.com/wisdom/turning-points/
My naval experience led me to the firm belief that most young men, if presented with the opportunity of military service — preferably in peacetime and as an officer — should grab the opportunity to gain leadership experience early in life.
From http://hbs1963.com/wisdom/turning-points/
RALPH LINSALATA What did I learn from the turning points in my life? Look for great colleagues, role models, and teachers. Be certain to understand the opportunities relative to the risks, and how the risks can be avoided. Recognize your strengths and weaknesses, and act accordingly. Play to your strengths while you work, but work on your weaknesses.
From http://hbs1963.com/wisdom/turning-points/
Chapter 10 Life's lessons JOSE M. FAUSTINO I switched fields twice in my academic career — I believed the entire experience was part of growing up. The lesson here for young people: Do not hesitate to switch interests, majors, or fields of concentration. Find your preference or your passion, then focus on it to your heart’s content. Success is a journey – not a race. Prepare well, retain good practices, and make a habit of effective strategies: Do not be content to be average. Mediocrity breeds boredom, poor opportunity, and an unsatisfactory lifestyle. Instead, decide to excel in everything you do, and be distinctive, if not unique, in your approach. Take well-analyzed risks, particularly when there is everything to gain and little to lose. Do not be afraid of rejection when you have competently and ethically tried to succeed. Be skilled in political strategy. Interpersonal, leadership, and motivational skills are all important for success, but few consider political strategy. In my mind, there is organizational politics in any group with more than three people.
From http://hbs1963.com/wisdom/lifes-lessons/
JUDY LEY ALLEN I have learned that the life lessons my parents tried to teach me were right after all, but sometimes I had to try the opposite just to be sure. Always be good to others. Look on the positive side. Do your best. Care for those less fortunate. Work hard. Lead a balanced life between work, family, and friendships. Never say an unkind thing about anyone — it will always come back to haunt you.
From http://hbs1963.com/wisdom/lifes-lessons/
BOB GRIFFIN Of all the things I thought would provide a happy and successful life, the one most undervalued was the attention paid to wife, children, and other family during the beginning years. Sacrifice of family for job achievement for the “long-term good of the family” was a myth. The long-term measure of success has less to do, in my view, with monetary achievement and public acknowledgement than with the privilege of being able to provide a path of progress and growth for the family and being part of a loving, supportive family unit. For me, that success was sometimes elusive, but I’m grateful to say it has been a steady foundation later in my life.
From http://hbs1963.com/wisdom/lifes-lessons/
WILLIAM J. WHITE Life is all about giving back. Start early. Doing something you love is not work. Don’t ever do anything just for the money. Making a contribution to your family, job, or friends is what really drives satisfaction. Grandchildren are the greatest! Phase into retirement slowly. Stay around young people. They will keep you young. Maintain balance in your life through your family, religion, career, friends, and hobbies. Networking is about giving — not taking. Take chances with your career. Don’t be afraid to take a step backward. Keep your sense of humor. There is fun to be found in most everything we do. A strong religious belief can solve a lot of problems. Long, happy marriages are related to many common interests. A wonderful spouse is a true gift. You are never as good or as bad as you may think you are. Stay humble. Curiosity and maintaining an open mind seem to be underrated leadership traits. Don’t avoid the screening tests and early warnings about your health.
From http://hbs1963.com/wisdom/lifes-lessons/
My mother taught me, “A good citizen leaves things better than he finds them.”
From http://hbs1963.com/wisdom/lifes-lessons/
Never forget where you came from, and always remember what you are here for. Be true to your values and faith. We are here for a purpose. Enjoy the ride.
From http://hbs1963.com/wisdom/lifes-lessons/ Chapter 11 吹牛皮 就没有节选了。
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